Forgiveness

I was raised to believe

That you don’t forgive for everyone else

But rather for another reason

Yourself

And so I wrote this one because

I got some shit to say.

Some things to get off my chest.

Some things I been holding for too many days

To my mother

Ma, I forgive you for leaving me that day.

I can only imagine what you felt

And why you couldn’t stay

You left me in great hands.

The best, I daresay.

She never wanted me to hate you either.

She told me that you loved me, every day.

And I love you too, Mama.

That’ll never be undone.

Because no matter how much pain you caused

I’m always gonna be your son.

To my pops

I know that no one understands you

Except me, cause I’m junior

And I really wish I could’ve said this sooner

I forgive you, Dad.

For all the stupid shit you did

For all the dumb fights we had

I wish we could’ve walked a different path instead

But pain is humbling and educating

Through my pain, I learned from you

I learned what man not to be

And parentwise, I learned what not to teach

So thanks again, Pops.

It really was a ride.

All the verbal hits, jabs and blows.

I took them all in stride.

But forgiveness isn’t one-sided.

Sometimes you need to be forgiven.

And trust me, it hurts like hell.

To think you’ll never be forgiven

But I have to keep hope

I have to keep walking no matter what

Cause even though, I’ve hurt people

I’m not giving up

I know I’m a good person

And I swear I’m trying to stay that way

But when I fail, it kills me

I just pick the wrong things to say

So to everyone that I’ve hurt, wronged or offended

I need you to believe this

You all mean so much to me, I can’t stress to you enough

How much I need your forgiveness