Californication

He stumbled into a local bar where his cup would stay full. Across the room, he spotted her. The one for whom he dedicated his one rule: never fall in love. That's for fools. Feeling as if she needed to hear this, he loudly spoke these rhymes while standing atop a stool.

"As amazingly bizarre as my attempts at love have been,
Losing you was perhaps my biggest sin.
For you, innocent and beautiful, beautifully innocent
Did not deserve me and my bullshit.

While I hoped an apology would suffice,
You have probably wished I died, multiple times
For that, I can’t not blame you.
I make no attempt to shame you.

In truth, I loved you.
As men love their wives.
You were mine, I was your guy.
Opposite sides of the country but still the loves of our lives.

Could you fathom that? The stories we laugh at,
We lived one of them! We were apart from them.
Those that can see their lover everyday and embrace them, hug their skin
We weren’t that fortunate to win. This sick twisted game we live in.

Where people can fall in love and never meet.
Where the love of my life is someone I’ve never heard speak,
You’re the only who could ever relate to me.
That’s why I fell so hard.

Plus you were the one I could lean my head on
As metaphorical as that may seem, it’s the truth
I gave my all to you
And you know that.

However, my flaws couldn’t hide for much longer.
I honestly thought you were stronger.
But that was an oversight on my part.
And it caused the greatest blow since V on my heart

She told what she thought of me and her assessment of my life.
While some of it may have been true, other parts were not right.
All I wanted to do was explain, to tell you what I should have said sooner
So you wouldn’t have to view me as some lost cause, some loser.

Didn’t know how to explain it. I didn’t know where to start
So I began rambling instead and ripping what we had apart
You were listening to the devil instead of me!
Taking ill-given advice whole-heartedly.

By the time I figured what had transpired,
You had already hated me.
Or at least my definition of hatred.
Something always known but never explicitly stated.

Hatred from you was you giving up on me.
You had finally gotten a glimpse of the crazy.
The real and true me. The one I wanted to keep a secret.
That’s when the wound deepened.

When I realized, the girl I loved was no more.
The day you walked out the metaphorical door.
I lost the one my heart beat for.
One lone girl. Who resides on the California shore."

and then he passed out.