Visions

Hallucinations. A premonition.
Of a lost time where I didn’t worry about what I was risking.
Sins I thought I forgot, but I find myself missing.
Diving deeper into this puddle, sinking.

The bowl is half full only when my brain’s empty.
Look at the boy you raised, addicted to THC.
Never thought this would be the me I grew up to see,
In the mirror everyday. Plus he’s here to stay.

He seems blinded to most but those with similar eyes know.
While seemingly without purpose, he has visions.
Hallucinations. Premonitions.
Where he isn’t a weed-smoking lost cause. He’s a little different.

Red eyes, red eyes.
Don’t betray me with these cloudy lies.
She lies in front me, rubbing her hands over her thighs.
Ignorant of the truth. I’m impervious to her guise.

You are not love.
You are lust wearing a mask.
Had Mary not married me tonight,
It would’ve been a truth I could not grasp.

My vision is cloudy but not defective.
I’m my own detective.
One shattered piece of this broken collective,
Called Earth. Life. A paradise that is so deceptive.

Red eyes, red eyes.
Don’t mislead me with those fires.
Don’t make me love and then make me tired.
Don’t allow hate to rise any higher.

You are not allies.
You are satisfaction manifested in conditional instances.
From that, draw this: you only love me when I’m not “different.”
Apparently, same is sane now a days. Conformity is gifted.

Only, that’s never been me.

I walk in a different direction, I step in different ways.
I don’t age. My art stays eternal, my mind creates for days.
So, believe me, my death at your hands was only brief.
I resurrected the night I realized you ain’t shit, unworthy of my grief.

Fret not.
My words are rarely taken to heart.
I lost my leeway and my mind in the same night.
So, to most, I probably look like I don’t know where to start.

Liner notes of my mind were burned long ago.
Back when all I knew was that I didn’t know.
Now I’m a little more enlightened and a lot less frightened.
Life is monster but my soul is a titan.

I’m still having visions.
Hallucinations. Premonitions.
Of a time when I won’t need to cry, much less through a rhyme.
Hope, I see you in the distance. Don’t take your time.